Every generation of missionaries has their own way of staying in touch with home. In my parents’ time it was simple: they wrote letters. They wrote, waited weeks, and the answer arrived. When my older brother left, email already existed, and phone calls were added, but only on Christmas and Mother’s Day. When my turn came, the same rules were in place, until things changed in the middle of my mission: now we could call every P-day. That was incredible news!
Today, things have changed even more, and communication via Facebook Messenger is typically allowed for messaging and video calls. All of these changes beg the question: what are the communication rules today?
You may even hear different versions of these rules because there are 1) general rules that stay the same for every mission, and 2) other rules that vary depending on the mission president. That’s why each mission can work a little differently. So let’s break it down.
1) What The Handbook Says
It all starts with Missionary Standards for Disciples of Jesus Christ, which anyone can read for free in the Gospel Library. These are the main points:
- Preparation day: communication happens on preparation day. That’s the day to write to family, to members, to people from other areas, and to the people they taught.
- With family, anything goes: letters, emails, messages, and phone or video calls.
- With everyone else, email or letter only: no phone calls or video calls, unless the mission president approves it.
- Read during the week, reply on P-day: they can read messages whenever they have an appropriate moment, but they only reply on preparation day, unless it’s an emergency or a special occasion.
- Be wise about it: they have to be wise about how long they communicate, be considerate of their companion, and keep the purpose of their service in mind.
- The missionary starts the conversation: they should be the one to start the messages, phone calls, and video calls. If the family needs to reach them directly, they should contact the mission president first.
2) What Can Vary By Mission
These are the scenarios and variations that come up most often:
- Immediate family only: Messenger with mom, dad, and siblings, and everyone else by email.
- Extended family included: they can also write to grandparents, uncles or cousins.
- No limit on contacts: they can send and receive messages from anyone, always on preparation day.
- No Messenger: no messaging at all. Email only.
- One reply per person: they receive everything without a problem, but they answer each person only once per P-day. There’s no back-and-forth conversation.
- With a cutoff time: communication has a fixed window, and when it’s over, it’s over, even if there are messages left unanswered.
How To Find Out The Exact Rules of Your Mission
Since the details vary, the reliable information may be in three places:
- The mission president’s letter. Many missions send families a letter at the beginning, and the specific rules for that mission may come attached to it.
- The mission’s Facebook group or page. Several missions have one for families, and they usually post that same text with the guidelines.
- The missionary. Once they arrive in the field and the rules are explained to them, they can share them with their family.
The communication guidelines may change, but the reason behind them always stays the same: there should be enough communication for the missionary to feel supported and motivated, and it should be organized in a way that doesn’t distract them from their missionary purpose.
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